01.28.09
Posted in um yeah at 11:54 pm by Heebus
This is obviously a girl with issues
Jewberg: hi
oneloveA97F: hello
oneloveA97F: how do you save lives?
oneloveA97F: you dont want to have kids?
oneloveA97F: goodbye
Jewberg: so you are looking to meet someone and be pregnant in a few months?
oneloveA97F: hahahah
Jewberg: im trying to understand your though process
oneloveA97F: my thought process is that having children is definitely in my future, i know
Jewberg: ok 1 year, 2 year, 4 year?
oneloveA97F: and i want someone who wants kids aswell
oneloveA97F: i dont really have a time line
oneloveA97F: but when i find my baby daddy, i will know
Jewberg: really
Jewberg: like the moment you meet him you will know?
oneloveA97F: i hope
Jewberg: and you will make babies right away?
oneloveA97F: probably not right away
Jewberg: but you want them before you get married
Jewberg: or so it seems by your tone
oneloveA97F: no that’s not true
oneloveA97F: will probably get married first
Jewberg: id be scared to meet you
Jewberg: you will want my babies
Jewberg: and poke holes in my condoms
oneloveA97F: dont be scared
oneloveA97F: i wont meet you
Jewberg: well i hope you meet your jdate sperm donor here, im sorry i couldnt be it
I think I just saved another life.
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01.20.09
Posted in um yeah at 12:37 pm by Heebus
We now join this conversation already in progress…
JuicyJoce: so y r u on jdate n e ways???
Jewberg: to find someone who knows how to type out full words like you 
JuicyJoce: 
Jewberg: are you persian?
JuicyJoce: yes i am 
JuicyJoce: how did u know?
Jewberg: you kinda look like you are
JuicyJoce: what ethnicity are u?
Jewberg: mom is israeli, dad is american
JuicyJoce: cool
Jewberg: do you date nonpersians?
JuicyJoce: yes lol
Jewberg: are you a typical persian girl?
JuicyJoce: what do u mean by typical?
Jewberg: you know the typical persian princess
JuicyJoce: i dont know….
JuicyJoce: lol
JuicyJoce: maybe u can ask more specific questions….
Jewberg: ok, do you live with your parents
JuicyJoce: yes
Jewberg: do you drive a bmw or mercedes
JuicyJoce: no
Jewberg: toyota camry?
JuicyJoce: yea how did u know?
Jewberg: i know these things
JuicyJoce: lol
Jewberg: youve already answered some of the other questions unknowingly
Jewberg: no for the kicker
Jewberg: now*
Jewberg: are you a virgin?
JuicyJoce: yes
Jewberg: ding ding ding, we have a winner
JuicyJoce: lol
Jewberg: all persian girls claim to be a virgin
JuicyJoce: that makes me a persian princess??
JuicyJoce: o so u dont believe me?
Jewberg: no just a typical persian
JuicyJoce: so its a bad thing that im a virgin?
JuicyJoce: if im getting the message correctly….
Jewberg: yeah if you are waiting for marriage it is
JuicyJoce: than thats a bummer for u i guess…cus i am
Jewberg: its a bummer for whomever you marry
JuicyJoce: y?
Jewberg: because he will marrying someone who sucks in bed
JuicyJoce: ohhh..omg r u serious? just because im a virgin DOES NOT mean I cant please my man…
Jewberg: you will be bad at sex though, its a certainty
Jewberg: but i doub you please men now
JuicyJoce: haha ok wtv…ur obviously way tooooo close minded never mind
Jewberg: haha thats ironic
Jewberg: you should not be close minded and experience sexuality before you marry some sucker
JuicyJoce: i wont marry anyone thank u…especially a sucker
Jewberg: so you are going to stay single forever?
JuicyJoce: no
JuicyJoce: i meant marry just anyone…
Jewberg: gotcha
Jewberg: i hear persian girls take it in the butt to save the front for marriage
JuicyJoce: omg who told u that?
Jewberg: some of the persian girls ive dated
JuicyJoce: well theres a reason why your not with them anymore
Jewberg: yeah they are all the same, been there done that
Jewberg: thats why i say they claim to be virgins
Jewberg: all a bunch of liars
JuicyJoce: if ur asking i take it in the ass…the anwers no…intercourse is intercourse whether its in the ass, the mouth or wtv..im a virgin and i mean it…if u dont believe it so be it.
Jewberg: its ok, i dont date virgins, they get too attached
JuicyJoce: haha u will never have to worry about that with me…promise
Jewberg: haha, you wont find a guy on this site better than me
JuicyJoce: o really whys that?
Jewberg: there are very few guys more awesome than me
JuicyJoce: well i guess uve met ur match 
Jewberg: ha
Jewberg: you cant match shit
Jewberg: you live with your parents
JuicyJoce: so….that has nothing to do with it….intellectually, and physically theres no one better on this site
Jewberg: haha
Jewberg: im way smarter than you
JuicyJoce: i dont doubt that you are….though for the women my age…im way more mature
Jewberg: haha not as a virgin you arent
Jewberg: you still havent lived on your own
Jewberg: or gone to a real school
Jewberg: how can you be mature
JuicyJoce: im not gonna even waste my time talking to you…srry i cant talk to a person whos soooooooooooooooooo shallow
Jewberg: says the persian girl
Jewberg: its not shallow
Jewberg: its reality
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01.16.09
Posted in um yeah at 12:55 am by Heebus
23:48:09 wayradbarb: right. because we’re looking for different things and I dont really want to at this point
23:48:38 heebus: thats kind of a 180
23:49:21 wayradbarb: yah it is. I had a lot of time to think about it. I mean as much as i love sex, I can get sex, but its harder to find someone to love. and that’s what I want
23:49:50 heebus: i still dont get why we shouldnt meet
23:49:58 heebus: we have a ton in common
23:50:05 heebus: i was looking forward to BSG nights…
23:50:10 wayradbarb: yeah we can meet. but im not hooking up with you
23:50:35 heebus: you know, the last girl that said that ate her words
23:50:51 wayradbarb: well then I really shouldn’t meet you then
23:51:01 heebus: so now you want to be celibate?
23:51:03 wayradbarb: just being honest ok?
23:51:39 wayradbarb: haha trust me im not celibate
23:52:12 heebus: i swear i dont get it then
23:52:27 wayradbarb: i dont know what to tell you then
23:52:33 wayradbarb: maybe im tired and will make more sense tomorrow
23:53:07 heebus: no its ok, im not sure theyve found a cure for retardation
23:53:09 -!- wayradbarb [wayradbarb@oscar] has quit [Leaving…]
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Posted in um yeah at 12:38 am by Heebus
Jewberg: hi
*** Waiting for TkngaChanceHere to connect
*** TkngaChanceHere’s IM window is open
TkngaChanceHere: hello
TkngaChanceHere: why did u not fill our weight?
TkngaChanceHere: oops I mean your
Jewberg: because when i made my profile i wasnt as sexy as i am now
TkngaChanceHere: hmm u fat?
Jewberg: not a all
Jewberg: well i have a nice big butt
Jewberg: but i think you would like it
TkngaChanceHere: cut it out
Jewberg: haha do you want my current weight measurement
Jewberg: down to the ounce?
TkngaChanceHere: well, honestly, my father was fat and I watched his struggle my whole life, so cuz of that, i don’t want to be with someone who is fat
TkngaChanceHere: so… people who don’t put their weight down are usually fat
Jewberg: what do you define as fat? i ride my bike 60-80 miles a week
Jewberg: but i drink beer
Jewberg: balance is the key to life
TkngaChanceHere: 60-80 mi / week is not a lot to counteract massive beer drinking
Jewberg: hmm well i can see you arent a nutrionist
Jewberg: so this isn exactly your forte
Jewberg: maybe i should have a computer competition with you
TkngaChanceHere: sure, what kind?
Jewberg: any kind
Jewberg: im an IT ninja
Jewberg: and an engineering ninja
Jewberg: i turn people into cyborgs
TkngaChanceHere: hmm I am more of a data analyst
TkngaChanceHere: who doesn’t drink beer
Jewberg: what do you drink?
Jewberg: and what kinda data do you analyze?
TkngaChanceHere: medical info
TkngaChanceHere: water
TkngaChanceHere: I mean that’s what I drink
Jewberg: oh
Jewberg: thats kinda boring
TkngaChanceHere: I like it
Jewberg: ive found people who dont drink to be quite lame
Jewberg: how are you not lame?
TkngaChanceHere: how are you not fat?
Jewberg: i exercise and eat right
Jewberg: i know, its rocket science
TkngaChanceHere: there are many ways I am not lame, plus I did not say I do not drink
Jewberg: you drink water, i got it
TkngaChanceHere: did u look at my profile pic?
TkngaChanceHere: water ismy drink of choice
Jewberg: water plus grenadine?
TkngaChanceHere: eww no
Jewberg: whats in it? miller 64 with red food coloring
Jewberg: why do you think im so fat?
Jewberg: im just big boned
TkngaChanceHere: cosmopolitan
TkngaChanceHere: cuz u didn’t put ur weight
Jewberg: i weigh 81.64 kg
Jewberg: happy?
Jewberg: would you like a naked pic for proof?
TkngaChanceHere: no naked pic jeez
Jewberg: good, thats a second date sorta thing
TkngaChanceHere: that is not fat, why ypou so touchy?
TkngaChanceHere: second date jeez u don’t waste any time
Jewberg: i like being touchy feely
TkngaChanceHere: not in that way
Jewberg: time is running out honey
Jewberg: this is a limied time offer
*** TkngaChanceHere’s IM window is closed
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01.12.09
Posted in um yeah at 12:54 am by Heebus
Paula1186: hi
Jewberg: hi, i thought i was too old
Paula1186: i changed my mind
Paula1186: it depends on the person
Jewberg: oh, do you change your mind a lot?
Paula1186: no i was new
Paula1186: to jdate
Paula1186: and i didnt have an age limit
Jewberg: and now?
Paula1186: 27
Paula1186: hehe
Jewberg: haha, and what are you looking for?
Paula1186: a young guy at heart
Paula1186: and i just need to make sure we want the same thing’
Jewberg: which is?
Paula1186: long term relationship
Paula1186: im a good girl tho
Paula1186: most guys dont want a good girl8)
Jewberg: define good girl, we like naughty girls
Paula1186: thats not me
Paula1186: im nice
Jewberg: virgin?
Paula1186: hehe
Jewberg: is that a yes?
Paula1186: forward eh
Paula1186: hehe
Jewberg: im just trying to figure you out
Jewberg: i know what i like, i wont settle for less
Paula1186: me too
Paula1186: just age
Jewberg: you still didnt answer my question though
Paula1186: haha
Paula1186: yeah and proud
Jewberg: proud that you are running out of time and that no guy wants to date a virgin?
Paula1186: yeah
Paula1186: running out of time for what
Paula1186: im 22
Paula1186: o
Jewberg: you dont have much time left to snatch a guy up
Paula1186: no i am scared to date an older guy bc im a virgin
Paula1186: but im proud to be one
Paula1186: i want the right person
Jewberg: why? because you know you suck in bed?
Paula1186: and i know ill find him
Paula1186: hahah
Paula1186: no
Jewberg: well most guys dont want to date a virgin, so lose that shit then come back
Jewberg: is not worth waiting for because you will never find the right person
Jewberg: and he will just leave you after he gets what he wants
Paula1186: well i will see
Paula1186: the right guy will
Paula1186: i dated a guy for 14 months and he stayed with me
Jewberg: oh man, what a sucker
Paula1186: well i guess ur not my match
*** Paula1186’s IM window is closed
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Posted in um yeah at 12:47 am by Heebus
Jewberg: i only see 2-3 movies a year in the theater
Loves2TravelE2E5: reallly?
Jewberg: and usually only if they are at the mann village
Loves2TravelE2E5: i love to go c movies!
Loves2TravelE2E5: well then…im sure ur going to see the movie
Loves2TravelE2E5: “he’s just not that into you” on feb. 6th
Jewberg: sounds like a chick flick
Loves2TravelE2E5: haha it is.
Loves2TravelE2E5: would have been funnier if u knew what the movie is about
Jewberg: my least favorite genre i think
Loves2TravelE2E5: ohh i love chick flicks for some reason and im not even that much of a girrly girl
Loves2TravelE2E5: sleepless in seatlle, when harry met sally, pretty woman, etc.
Jewberg: oy
Loves2TravelE2E5: hahaha
Jewberg: im an action flick kinda guy
Loves2TravelE2E5: yea…blow their heads off kind of guy
Jewberg: yes, the more shit blowing up the better
Loves2TravelE2E5: action im ok with. violence ehhh not so much
Loves2TravelE2E5: oy
Loves2TravelE2E5: back atcha
Jewberg: what action is there that isnt violence?
Jewberg: boobs and stuff blowing up, ill see it
Loves2TravelE2E5: thats lovely
Loves2TravelE2E5: good to know what grabs ur attention
Loves2TravelE2E5: yea… i dont think if i was into breats all that much we would be talking right now
Jewberg: sure we would
Jewberg: we could discuss the finer points
Loves2TravelE2E5: oh god…
Jewberg: i take it you dont like manly men
Jewberg: who hunt their own food and shave with butter knives?
Loves2TravelE2E5: manly men?? haha
Loves2TravelE2E5: “the provider”
Jewberg: i save lives by day, hunt food at night
Jewberg: no no not the provider
Jewberg: just do manly things
Loves2TravelE2E5: so u work at the post office?
Loves2TravelE2E5: while sparying on axe
Jewberg: watch sports, drink beer, watch stuff blow up
Jewberg: haha
Jewberg: working at the post office isnt manly
Jewberg: turning humans into cyborgs is manly
Loves2TravelE2E5: what do u do?
Jewberg: i design implantable medical devices
Loves2TravelE2E5: that screams testosterone
Jewberg: actually it measures pressure
Loves2TravelE2E5: thank u for the clarification
Jewberg: no problem, anytime
Jewberg: im great at useless and useful knowledge
Loves2TravelE2E5: good to know u can spit out random facts while spraying on axe and eating read meat
Loves2TravelE2E5: red*
Jewberg: mmm meat, are you a vegan?
Loves2TravelE2E5: nope
Loves2TravelE2E5: but i only eat side salads
Loves2TravelE2E5: kidding
Jewberg: i told my buddy “dont worry, your wife is safe with me, i dont bang chicks with kids”
Jewberg: opps wrong window
Loves2TravelE2E5: ewww
Jewberg: best non sequiter ever
Loves2TravelE2E5: ok.. not sure what to say to that
Loves2TravelE2E5: little immature though
Jewberg: im very immature when it comes to crude jokes
Loves2TravelE2E5: well try and keep it pg-13 when ur first talking to someone
Jewberg: pg 13 is very violent these days
Loves2TravelE2E5: G then
Jewberg: also when you should spell out your words completely, its very immature
*** Loves2TravelE2E5’s IM window is closed
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