04.24.08
Posted in um yeah at 11:42 pm by Heebus
This one is for Regina, you know this girl…
We join this stupid virgin persian conversation already in progress.
Jewberg: and they didnt make you go to dentistry school or pharmacy
school?
Jewberg: what kind of persian parents do you have?
mish22E226: haha
mish22E226: very chill parents
mish22E226: that’s why I can still live at home
Jewberg: i dont know, i generally stay away from these kinds of
situations
mish22E226: what does that mean?
Jewberg: persian girls who live with their parents
mish22E226: haha
mish22E226: defnitely not your typical one…
Jewberg: oh whats that mean?
mish22E226: but I know what you mean
mish22E226: well… how many persian girls do you know that went to
San Diego State for 4 years
mish22E226: for starteres
Jewberg: 0
mish22E226: and got a teaching gig right out of high school
Jewberg: its never happened before
Jewberg: in the history of mankind
mish22E226: haha
mish22E226: you are a comedian
Jewberg: because persian girls claim to be virgins
Jewberg: virgins dont go to sdsu
Jewberg: well
Jewberg: they go
mish22E226: hmmmm
Jewberg: but they dont emerge virgins
mish22E226: I’m sure a lot say… define virging
mish22E226: virgin
Jewberg: you know, having sex…
mish22E226: have you dated a persian girl?
Jewberg: yes, you dont just come up with these stereotypes from
watching TV
mish22E226: right
mish22E226: well… people who know me know I’m not the typical
“persian girl”… but I’m not going to go against my peeps either
Jewberg: how are you atypical?
*** mish22E226’s IM window is closed
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04.16.08
Posted in um yeah at 10:52 pm by Heebus
Jewberg: oh yeah hot body
HotHotGoddess: thanks
Jewberg: so what do you model for? anorexia monthly?
HotHotGoddess: oh, SNAP. real clever.
HotHotGoddess: Don’t be jealous, fat ass.
HotHotGoddess: that I’d never give you the time of day in real life.
Jewberg: they make watches that small?
HotHotGoddess: You look 40, btw. How’s that working out for you?
Jewberg: oh you know it, i get all the 18 year old girls looking for a sugar
daddy
HotHotGoddess: classy
Jewberg: i love the exposed collarbone look, its getting me really hot
and bothered
HotHotGoddess: I’ve been doing a’rite for myself so far.
HotHotGoddess: Don’t hate, just because you’re forced onto the fat girls
because the good ones won’t look your way
Jewberg: hmm you could be right, but i think you should swallow more
HotHotGoddess: such a charmer.
HotHotGoddess: I’m sure all the ladies love it.
HotHotGoddess: too bad I don’t speak asshole.
Jewberg: you obviously dont eat asshole either …. or anything for that
matter
HotHotGoddess: you’re so charming, jewberg. and clever, for that matter.
but I expected nothing less, with a name like that.
HotHotGoddess: haha, awesomesauce! loser
HotHotGoddess: How’s that rosacia going for you?
Jewberg: hmm normally im the one throwing out the insults to make
myself feel better but apparently you are the queen of it
Jewberg: i guess if i looked like you did i would need all the help i can
get
Jewberg: i wonder how guys look at you
Jewberg: but then i think if you turn sideways they cant see you
Jewberg: do you rattle when you walk?
HotHotGoddess: Hey, 2nd grade called, and it wants its insults back.
Jewberg: hey 2nd grade called, it wants its body back
HotHotGoddess: Plus, I’m unclear on what your problem is. Don’t take all
the jdate rejection out on me, just because all us hot girls find you
repulsive.
Jewberg: hot girls looooove the kks, but its more meat than youve ever
had
HotHotGoddess: you know why you have a personality? because you
HAD to. got nothing else going for you.
HotHotGoddess: I can be shitty because I look this good.
HotHotGoddess: so eat it.
Jewberg: the irony is astounding
Jewberg: so really what do you model for? pre teen clothes?
HotHotGoddess: I was gonna put some modeling pics up, but I didn’t
want to be too intimidating.
HotHotGoddess: Maybe that wasn’t the best idea.
HotHotGoddess: you would know better than to talk to me if you saw
them.
Jewberg: why because i would be afraid of soliciting kiddie porn on the
internet?
HotHotGoddess: maybe it’s not the best idea to have your first picture
accentuate your quadruple chin.
HotHotGoddess: just some constructive criticism for you.
HotHotGoddess: also, try not being a jerk.
HotHotGoddess: that works better too.
HotHotGoddess: unless you’re playing hard to get
HotHotGoddess: in which case
HotHotGoddess: barking up the wrong tree…
Jewberg: tree? i thought you were a pine needle at best
HotHotGoddess: men love me. especially rich ones.
HotHotGoddess: so either way
HotHotGoddess: you couldn’t afford me.
HotHotGoddess: even if you were bill gates.
HotHotGoddess: fag
Jewberg: oh and hey, the concentration camp look ended about 60
years ago
Jewberg: oh yeah, let me spend all my money on some bitch that i
would crush with my down comfoter
HotHotGoddess: at least your penis would fit comfortably inside my 1
inch vaginal canal
Jewberg: why fuck you there, i could get it inbetween your ribcage
HotHotGoddess: once I had a yeast infection, and my ex called me a
quarter pounder with cheese
HotHotGoddess: so honestly, jewberg…
HotHotGoddess: you’re just turning me on
Jewberg: haha i love that
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04.01.08
Posted in um yeah, Awesomesauce at 4:01 pm by Heebus
So I figured maybe there should be some positive things on this website. You know when someone actually does something right for once.
In this epic struggle of the sexes, I think it would behoove mankind if women decided to stop being so crazy and listen for a second. I mean, wouldn’t the world be a better place if girls knew how easy it was to win over men? Oh wait they already do…
Shit, where was I going with this…
Ladies and gentlemen, I now will give you an examples of things you can say to a guy to win him over:
“Yea but I’d rather watch fighting robots.”
See how simple that was ladies? Simple things like that can bring peace on earth. But who fucking cares right? Barney’s is having a sale!
/facepalm
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